Like Maybe Forever
by QuinnBekah
Summary: Your name is KARKAT VANTAS and your moirail is acting really fucking strange. You mean, stranger than usual. Pale-to-Flushed!Gamkar fic featuring Black!Gamrezi, eventual Pale!Johnkat and implied one-sided Black!Davekat.


Title: Like Maybe Forever

Pairing: Gamkar

POV: Switches between characters

Rating: T

Warnings: Course Language, angst, non-canon.

Summary: Your name is KARKAT VANTAS and your moirail is acting really fucking strange. You mean, stranger than usual.

A/N: Okay here it goes, my first ever Homestuck fic :) The pairing is eventually flushed gamkar, with sub pairings gamrezi, johnkat, and davekat. Rated T because of language and what not. This particular fic isn't nsfw, but I am working on a blackrom davekat nsfw fic if anyone is interested Enjoy!

**Like Maybe Forever**

Your name is GAMZEE MAKARA and you cannot motherfuckin' believe you all up and scored such a motherfuckin' wonderful best bro. How the fuck a psychotic clown like yourself all up and convinced such a motherfuckin' awesome troll to be your motherfuckin' moirail is beyond your thinkpan capacities. You hate to be all motherfuckin' ungrateful like to the mirthful messiah's for granting you such a miraculous miracle, but you can't help your feelings. It's not like you can just switch off all this red you got fillin' up your blood pump for the little guy.

You guess if you we're all up and being honest with yourself, which is the only fuckin' thing you can get to being, pale was exactly the way you were all up and feeling about him when this motherfuckin' relationship all up and started. You were flushin' pretty red for another motherfucker.

But a lot of things came to you when you lost your slime. Not only did you discover your true motherfuckin' destiny, and become schoolfed on all of the miraculous motherfuckin' truths about this messed up thing called life, but you also learned to motherfuckin' let go of all of the motherfuckin' things you were all up and yearning for when you were cooked out of your thinkpan.

And so your pale bro grew in your motherfuckin' heart and got all up to switchin' quadrants. And there was nothing you could do to put a stop to it.

Of course, you and Karkat get up to havin' all kinds of motherfuckin' feels jams and you know he's flushing red for your current kismesis.

Maybe that's why you can't motherfuckin' stand her. (Although you have to be all up and getting to appreciate her motherfuckin' slammin' black pailing skills.) Karkat hasn't gotten all up to knowin' about you and the blind troll's kismesissitude yet. You don't want to motherfuckin' upset him because you know him and Terezi have been vacillating quadrants for a sweep. You don't want him to all up and feel like you stole Terezi away from him before he could all up and even settle. And you guess you just don't want your bro to feel all up and left out of it all.

So you just keep all of this motherfuckin' black for Terezi and red you got going on for him to yourself. You sometimes wish you had a motherfucker to talk to about it, but of course that's what a fuckin' moirail is for, and you can't be getting to motherfuckin' doing that!

You let out a quiet sigh and lean your head back up against the motherfuckin' vent wall. You like that you can get up to hiding in these motherfuckin' vents because then Karkat can't all up and find you when you don't want to be found. By anybody. Not even your moirail.

Your name is KARKAT VANTAS and you are in dire need of a fucking feels jam RIGHT THE FUCK NOW and your goddamn moronic moirail is nowhere in fucking sight! You are having extremely mixed feelings about everyone on your potential quadrant radar, including your pale ass clown friend himself. You don't want to tell him that of course, but you know just being near him will calm you down enough to force your thinkpan to figure it's shit out for itself.

You don't know why you took on the task of being his fucking moirail in the first place. You knew your feelings for him were red of course, but whether they were flushed or pale was a whole other story. You curse your past self for making such a quick decision when you hadn't sorted out all of your feelings yet. You guess you just jumped in in this time of dire need because you knew no one else was going to. And without you to fill his conciliatory quadrant, the asshole probably would have gone on another rampage and culled all of your asses right that minute.

But now that your best friend has calmed the fuck down enough that he hasn't torn apart the entire meteor, you wonder if he'd be okay without a moirail, and would instead like to give matespritship a try.

You don't even know yet, it makes your thinkpan ache just trying to figure it all the fuck out.

On top of that, you don't know how the fuck you feel about Terezi since Gamzee is slowly taking over your flushed quadrant. You and Terezi have been vacillating between flushed and caliginous for over a sweep now. You would guess that if you take your red relationship with Gamzee to Matespritship, then Terezi could finally settle into your caliginous quadrant. Right? FUCKING WRONG. Because on fucking top of all of that bullshit, you've got the biggest hate crush on the king of human douchebags, Dave Strider. And fuck if you haven't told yourself a billion gog damn times that humans can't feel black romance and that his thinkpan is so fucking primitive that even the mere mention of kismesissitude could cause it to spontaneously combust and he'd be left as fucking human pile of burnt mush for the rest of his unfortunately immortal existence.

You are just so fucking done with all of this romance shit. Being a teenage troll is literally the hardest shit you've ever had to deal with, and you fucking hate your past self for getting you into all of those fucking romcoms, knowing all this shit just makes your decisions that much harder.

Where the actual fuck is your fucking sorry excuse for a moirail!?

Your name is GAMZEE MAKARA and you can see your pale bro stomping around the meteor just outside of the motherfuckin' vent you're all up and gettin' to be occupying. He looks pretty motherfuckin' pissed off, and you know all up in the miraculous workings of your motherfuckin' blood pump that you, as his moirail, should be all up and gettin' to shooshing all of that anger right the fuck out of him. But you don't want all of the little motherfuckers anger all going up in your direction, so you decide to lay low in your vent. You just motherfuckin' wish you could talk to the motherfucker and maybe sort out all of these motherfuckin' FEELINGS. You don't even know what the motherfuck to do with all of these motherfuckin' feelings.

Without your motherfuckin' sopor, all of the murderous motherfuckin' voices ring through your motherfuckin' thinkpan. Mostly they enlighten you to the motherfuckin' miracles of the destiny the great messiah's have laid the motherfuck out for you, and keep you on the right motherfuckin' path. You guess maybe the motherfuckin' urges you got to cull all of your motherfuckin' friends aren't that great though, even though they're filthy lowbloods who motherfuckin' deserve it. The motherfuckers should be grateful, like Equius was. But never fuckin' mind any of that noise. Karkat does a slammin' job of helping you keep down the noise in your thinkpan so that you can maybe get your focus on about this motherfuckin' game. But you haven't fuckin' spoken to your moirail in too long now and sometimes the voices come the fuck back. Like now.

Okay, so maybe when you all up and stated that you were completely over the motherfucker you were flushin' red for you maybe were exaggerating that motherfuckin' point just a bit. There's certainly a lot of motherfuckin' red in your heart for your palebro, that was no word of a motherfuckin' lie, but sometimes you'll be getting your reminisce on with the head of your old, dead flush crush.

At the moment you're all curled up and cozy in your motherfuckin' hiding spot, clutching tight to the only motherfuckin' piece of your old bro that you got left. At first you just all up and motherfuckin' held it. Then you were all like to talk to it a bit, maybe be like to pretending that he was still motherfuckin' alive. But then the motherfuckin' voices. The motherfuckin' noise in your motherfuckin' thinkpan decided to all up and take over your game of make believe. And Tavros started motherfuckin' talking back.

"Uh… Uhh… Gamzee? Gamzee… you look a bit, uh, sad, I think. Do you, uh, want to maybe talk about it? With, uh, me?"

"Yeah, motherfucker. I think I would really be getting to like that."

"Well, uh, what seems to, uh, be the problem then?"

You laugh humourlessly at the motherfuckin' dead thing in your hands. You're all up and gettin' to be scaring your motherfuckin' self here, but you guess you've got to all up and finish what you motherfuckin' started.

"You're motherfuckin' gone, bro. You're motherfuckin' dead. And I was all up and being to feel red for a motherfucker. I WAS ALL UP AND BEING TO FEEL RED FOR MOTHERFUCKIN' YOU, BRO. AND NOW YOU'RE MOTHERFUCKIN' GONE!"

"Oh, well, uh. If it's any, uh, consolation, I think, maybe, I could feel maybe a little red for you too."

"It's too motherfuckin' late for that, motherfucker! You were all up and like to chasing Serket for sweeps, bro. And you never even motherfuckin' noticed all of the red I was all up and feeling. YOU NEVER EVEN ALL UP AND ACKNOWLEDGED MY MOTHERFUCKIN' FEELINGS! AND NOW IT'S TOO MOTHERFUCKIN' LATE. Because you're motherfuckin' dead, bro."

"Uh well, I'm sorry, I guess, for all of that stuff you just mentioned. But, uh, maybe, I think it doesn't matter that I'm dead? Because, uh, we're talking just fine right now and, uh, maybe I don't need to be alive to be your matesprit?"

"YOU'RE A MOTHERFUCKIN' VOICE IN MY HEAD, BRO. You're just a motherfuckin' figment of my motherfuckin' demented thinkpan. And I've already been getting to all up and feeling red for another motherfucker. Not that it fucking matters any."

"Uh, okay. Well, even if I'm not real, like you say, maybe I can be of some help to your, uh, current situation? Since I'm not real, I can't tell anyone, so maybe you'd want to, uh, talk to me about it?"

"Hehe, yeah motherfucker. I guess I could be all up and getting like to tell a motherfucker about my problems."

"Uhh… okay."

"I guess I should all up and tell you that I'm not as motherfuckin' flushed for you no more, because I've got motherfuckin' red feels for my pale bro. And I don't know what the motherfuck I'm supposed to be all up and motherfuckin' doin' about it. And I've formed a motherfuckin' kismesissitude with the motherfucker HE feels motherfuckin' flushed for. So now, I guess I've just really motherfuckin' messed the motherfuck up big time." You frown at the expressionless face in your hands, hoping it can all up and give you some motherfuckin' advice. Deep down you know that you've fuckin' lost it, but you don't think you can get all and up to rightfully caring much.

"Uh, well, I think, maybe you should tell Karkat how you feel? Because, even if he doesn't feel that way about you, he's your moirail and he'll understand. And, uh, isn't that supposed to be his job anyway? Understanding and, uh, getting you to maybe feeling better about the situation?"

"You may be fuckin' right, motherfucker. But that doesn't all up and stop this motherfuckin' nauseated feel I got deep in my motherfuckin' digestion sac every motherfuckin' time I get to thinking about maybe telling my bro the motherfuckin' truth."

"Well, uh, I don't think you need to be scared. Uh, Karkat loves you, and uh, he'll understand. And if it were, uh, me-."

"YOU? IF IT WERE MOTHERFUCKIN' YOU? YOU'RE MOTHERFUCKIN' DEAD! YOU'RE NOT EVEN TAVROS! YOU'RE A MOTHERFUCKIN' VOICE IN MY MOTHERFUCKIN' THINKPAN ALL UP AND TRYING TO GET ME TO MOTHERFUCKIN' CULL MY FRIENDS! THEY'RE MY MOTHERFUCKIN' FRIENDS YOU MOTHERFUCKER! I don't want to. I don't want to be getting to killing no more of my motherfuckin' bros. I don't want my motherfuckin' pale bro to find me. Why don't you just get all up and leave me the motherfuck alone?"

You throw the head away from you and collapse in the vent with your big hands up over your auditory ducts. Light purple liquid leaks from your motherfuckin' eyes as you collapse into uncontrollable sobs.

You don't motherfuckin' want this to be your motherfuckin' self.

You just want to go back to the way it used to motherfuckin' be.

And you really just want your motherfuckin' moirail.

Your name is KARKAT VANTAS and you can't fucking believe you're about to do this. On your fucking quest through this goddamn sorry excuse for a living space while looking for your half-crazed no good fucking juggalo, you just had to happen to run into Terezi and Dave who are still making a fucking mess on the damn walls with all of their stupid chalk.

You must be out of your fucking thinkpan due to lack of contact with your moirail to be doing this. You can't fucking believe you're actually going to admit out loud that your red for that stupid clown assed fucker. And you can't fucking believe that your about to ask this girl you've been nigh on flushing for for fucking SWEEPS to be your fucking kismesis! You must be cracked. That's the only fucking explanation that is even plausible in this situation.

"Terezi!" you yell, unable to stop yourself now, "can I talk to you for a minute?"

She looks up, despite the fact that she can't actually see you, "Yeah, sure Karkat! What is it?" She gets up, brushing the chalk dust off of her pants. She pauses for a minute, seemingly contemplating what she's about to do, then licks all of the chalk off of her hands.

"Ugh gross! Terezi did you have to fucking do that in front of me? It's fucking gross how desperate you are to taste colors that you'll consume unhealthy amounts of inedible dust on a regular basis! Fuck!" you scrunch your face up in mild disgust.

"Well if you don't want me to eat it you could always let me have a taste of that delicious candy blood of yours!" she laughs.

"Shut up." You roll your eyes at her, "I have something fucking important to ask you and I'd really rather not do it in front of the Dave Human. Can you just like, step out of the room for a minute maybe?"

"Whatever the fuck you've got to say to her you can say in front of me, bro." Dave pipes up.

Your blood boils, he makes you fucking sick with hate, "Shut the fuck up bulgelicker, I said I wanted to talk to her in private fuckass! Why don't you just fuck off to your stupid Can Town of chalk and morons?"

"Karkat! Don't be like that! Dave is my friend, whatever you want to say he will keep in the utmost confidence! Right Dave?"

"That is the most correct statement that's ever fucking been made." He nods.

You want to tear your breath tube out.

"Fine. I don't fucking care anymore. Terezi, you know that you and I have been on a kind of confusing level concerning quadrants for the past few sweeps and-"

"Wait. Are you saying you finally settled? Karkat! Are you asking me out?" She smiles devilishly, all of her pointy teeth showing.

"Uh yeah I guess. I think I want you to be my kismesis. If you hate me the way I hate you." Even as you say it you can feel the lie. You're such a fucking moron. You know you don't hate Terezi. You have your black moments, sure but you've never felt a hate more passionate than the one you feel for Strider.

"Oh." Her face falls, "I thought... I was hoping for a different quadrant."

And now you are the biggest asshole on the meteor. You are the fucker who broke Terezi Pyrope's heart and lied to her about feeling spades.

"I'm sorry." You say, and you mean it, "I think I'm flushed for someone else."

"Oh. Well, I'm flattered that you hate me, but I've already filled that quadrant, Karkat. And I just don't hate you."

You nod, feeling like an even bigger moron and fucking loathing your past self who decided to go through with this with a hate that rivals your contempt for Dave.

"Do you mind if I ask who?" You mutter at the risk of sounding like an even bigger dick.

"If it's all the same to you, Karkat, I'd much rather keep that private."

You hear a snickering from the corner, "Dude. I don't know how this whole hatedate thing works, but you really gotta learn how to pick up chicks!"

You spin around before you can stop, glaring at the true object of your loathing with the ferocity of a giant barkbeast. "WHY DON'T YOU STAY THE FUCK OUT OF THIS AND SHUT YOUR FUCKING TALKBLASTER, YOU FUCKING DISGRACEFUL EXCUSE OF A LIFEFORM?"

The insufferable prick has the fucking audacity to laugh harder.

"Karkat!" Terezi stops you before you can take this any farther, "With all due respect, it seems to me that maybe I'm not the one you hate."

"What the fuck are you suggesting?!" You snap, going red.

"Oh!" Dave laughs, "That's why he treats me like such a piece of shit. Dude wants the D."

"I DO NOT WANT ANYTHING YOU NOOKSUCKER!" You growl.

"Admit it bro. You're getting your hate on hard for some fucking prime Strider cock." He smirks.

"FUCK YOU. FUCK YOUR ENTIRE FUCKING PLANET. I TAKE BACK ANY PART I HAD IN YOUR FUCKING EXISTENCE. JUST... JUST FUCK YOU!" You storm out of the room before you can embarrass yourself further. You've never felt so awful in your entire life and that's saying a lot.

Even if your feelings for him aren't so pale, you really wish Gamzee was here.

"Karkat?" You hear a little obnoxious voice coming from behind you and you turn to face John.

"What the fuck do you want?" You sigh.

"Are you okay?"

"Why the fuck wouldn't I be?" You say quietly, giving up.

He gives you a small, sad smile, and pulls you into a hug before you can say no.

"It's okay, Karkat. Whatever's the matter, it'll turn out okay." He says.

You pull away from him and look at him in surprise, "I... I already have moirail, Egbert."

He laughs, "It's okay. I don't even know what that is really! But I don't want to see you sad, so if you ever want to talk just come find me! Okay?" He smiles, oblivious to the diamonds he's giving off to you as he does so.

"Okay." You say quietly, pale affection filling you up uncontrollably.

What the fuck is wrong with you? Why the fuck do you have to be cursed with such raging hormones?

This is the worst fucking thing, the actual worst. There is nothing worse than this.

Your name is GAMZEE MAKARA and there is nothing motherfuckin' worse than this.

There is nothing motherfuckin' worse than being all up and lonely on your hornpile with no motherfucker to get your snuggle on with.

And to fuckin' top that the fuck off with the motherfuckin' cherry of horrible, your motherfuckin' kismesis just stomped the fuck into the room and you are not up in the motherfuckin' mood to get your black on right at this moment.

"Hey there my most contemptible motherfuckin' black sister." You smirk.

"Shut the fuck up Gamzee, I'm not here to fight or to pail." She sneers.

"Well that's a motherfuckin' miracle. I wasn't all up and in the mood to get my motherfuckin' blackrom on all at this motherfuckin' moment." You flop back onto the hornpile.

"Excuse me! I'm still talking to you!"

"Well get the fuck to it, cause I'm not all up to motherfuckin' listening."

"When's the last time you talked to Karkat?"

You sit the fuck back up as fast as you can be all to getting to.

"Karkat?"

"Yes, Karkat, dumbass! Your MOIRAIL! The one you're supposed to be having regular feelings jams with! Are you honestly so fucking selfish that you'd rather take a nap on your hornpile than calm down your best friend!?"

"What's all up and the matter with my best bro?" you ask, not entirely being all to get the situation really.

"Well for one, he just asked me to be his _kismesis! _What am I supposed to say to that, huh? You're the one who's too afraid to tell him!"

"Well I just didn't want a brother to be all feeling lonely I guess."

"Yeah well now he's lonelier than ever. Do you expect him to have to go through his feelings on his own? That's what moirails are for! If you were going to be such a shitty moirail you never should have tried in the first place!" She yells as she stomps out of the room before the black urges you both got up and going for each other cause you both to jump each other then and there.

"Yeah bro." you whisper to your own self, "I am a shitty motherfuckin' moirail. I shouldn't have been to all up and hide my motherfuckin' feels from my best bro like that. I guess I should motherfuckin' find the little guy and fess the motherfuck up."

You get your bony motherfuckin' ass up off the hornpile. You hate to leave it, it's so motherfuckin' comfy like and all the horns are so alluring just beggin' for you to squeeze 'em. But you can't let your thinkpan be focusing on things like that now. You've got to all up and find your motherfuckin' moirail.

For the first time in a long motherfuckin' while you let yourself wander down the actual halls of the meteor instead of all up and hiding in the vents. It's dangerous, you got your know on about all that, especially with Kanaya up and ready to saw your motherfuckin' juggalo ass into motherfuckin' pieces.

You find your bro up in the lab. There's not a single motherfuckin' troll in your vision spectrum and you guess that's why Karkat decided to all up and come in here. You know your bro likes to get his quiet on when he's being all mopey like. Even during feels jams he was always a quiet little motherfucker when he was really and truly upset. You know everybody thinks he's all up and angry all the motherfuckin' time because he gets his shout on at them all the time, but he wasn't really mean. He was just a little motherfuckin' insecure like and he was all like to hide it with all the loudness. But when he was really motherfuckin' upset… when the motherfucker was like to cry, he got really quiet like. It was sad. It was enough for you to get your tears going for the little fucker who was so prominently embedded into your blood pump.

He wasn't like to hear you approaching him. You came up behind him quiet like so as not to disturb him. You still weren't quite sure what the motherfuck you were gonna be saying.

"Hey there best bro." You say quietly after a minute of trying to get your thinkpan cleared.

Karkat spins around so fast he was almost like to scare you. He lets out a long sigh like he's getting his relief on but he doesn't smile, just is like to grab the front of your shirt and pull you to him to hug you. You let yourself smile a little.

"Gamzee. Where in the ever-loving fuck have you been? I've been looking for you everywhere. I almost thought Kanaya found you and slaughtered your bony ass. Don't fucking scare me like that again, fuckass." He says into your shirt.

You laugh shortly but it's got no humour in it, "Sorry bro. I was being like to have a little alone time I guess. Had to get my thinkpan in some motherfuckin' order."

"Isn't that my job anyway? Damn it, Gamzee! We really need to get a hold on this moiralleigance thing! I feel like you don't even want me anymore!" he yells, letting go of your shirt and being like to back the fuck up from you.

"IT'S NOT LIKE I'M NOT ALL UP AND BEING LIKE TO GET MY MOTHERFUCKIN' TRY ON BRO! YOU DON'T EVEN GOT YOUR UNDERSTANDING ON ABOUT HOW MUCH TRY I GIVE TO THIS MOTHERFUCKIN' RELATIONSHIP!" you yell despite trying your hardest to hold your anger back. You sigh, all up and knowing Karkat wouldn't have been like to tell you exactly how he felt unless he was being all like to be fed up with it. "Sorry, motherfucker. I didn't mean to get harsh about it."

"It's fine." He says shortly but makes no move to shoosh you like he would have been like to in previous jam sessions.

You guess you better get to the motherfuckin' confessing part with some sort of haste, but you just don't want to be like to depressing Karkat when it seems like this moiralleigance is all up and so important to him.

"Bro?"

"What?"

"I've got some motherfuckin' confessing to do." You tell him.

"About what?" he asks, his eyes being like to narrow at you in suspicion a little.

"I haven't been like to be acting like the best moirail. I've been motherfuckin' lying to you a little bit about some things. I guess I was just motherfuckin' scared you wouldn't want to be my bro anymore." You say, not being like to have to courage to look directly at him.

"What did you do?" he asks darkly.

You lower your head, being wary of your long motherfuckin' horns so as not to poke out your flush crush's eye, "Me and Terezi have been like to sneaking behind your back for a while. We got some pretty strong motherfuckin' hate on for each other, bro. And I knew you was confused about how it was you were feeling for her, so I didn't want you to be all up and thinking I stole her from you or nothing. I'm real sorry about it, bro. But I guess you can't all up and help your motherfuckin' feelings when you're getting your hate on hard for a motherfucker."

"Is that all? Gamzee, it's okay. I mean, I'm not thrilled that you fucking lied to me about it, but I wasn't really black for Terezi anyway. And if you were ever here to listen to me, you would fucking know that already dumbass!" he shakes his head, finally being like to show you a smile.

You're happy he isn't all up and mad at you about Terezi. But you still got more to say, and your nerves haven't quit all up and tying knots in the pit of your digestion sac yet.

But damn do you love the way the little motherfucker smiles.

Your name is KARKAT VANTAS and your moirail is acting really fucking strange. You mean, stranger than usual. Okay, you guess that confession warranted some strange behaviour and you can see why he'd be so fucking terrified of your reaction, but it doesn't actually bother you that much. You're over it. You're over her. You think you might have been for a while now actually. You mean, how can you flush for Terezi when you're so flushed for this asshole juggalo right here? And you have to admit, at least to yourself, that you hate Dave more than anyone else you've ever hated. Including your past and future self. So you really have nothing to be angry at Gamzee for.

But even after his confession he's still fucking jumpy and looking away from you like an insecure wriggler. You can't take it anymore; this asshole is driving you crazy. It's fucking adorable and at the same time you are so annoyed by it that you have to make him stop.

"Fuck Gamzee! What the fuck is wrong with you? I said it was okay! Why are you so fucking jumpy?"

He sighs and finally looks at you. He isn't smiling; he still looks nervous and scared. You suddenly remember how young he is. How young you all are, even though it feels like a million sweeps have gone by since you started playing SGRUB.

"I think I should be like to finish my confession now." He murmurs.

What else could this asshole have to confess that he would be even more nervous to tell you than about his kismesissitude with Terezi?

You sit up from the spot the two of you had been occupying on the floor and look at him seriously, waiting.

"I've got to let a motherfucker know, even if you'll be like to stop being my moirail, or any other motherfuckin' thing for that matter."

You go to interrupt him, to tell him you'll never stop loving him no matter what he did. And that, no you don't want to be his moirail, but you want to be so much more. You want to take this so much redder. But he doesn't let you.

"I didn't want to be all up and ruining this beautiful moiralleigance we've got going on here, but I guess I just wasn't going to be like to sit back and let you think that's how I was feeling. I KNOW. I MOTHERFUCKIN' KNOW I'M RUINING IT NOW WITH THE WORDS SPOUTING FROM MY TALKBLASTER BUT I JUST WASN'T GOING TO BE LIKE TO LET YOU NOT KNOW BRO! I wasn't going to be like to let you not know how I was really motherfuckin' feeling deep down in the motherfuckin' core of it all. I had to come and motherfuckin' confess to you how I was motherfuckin' feeling in my soul, even if that means you ain't going to be like to love me anymore." He's on the brink of tears now, and you're so fucking confused. You can't even fathom what's going on in this dumbass's thinkpan right now. You don't know what to say but you just don't want to see him cry.

"Gamzee what the fuck are you talking about?"

"YOU." He yells, "I'M MOTHERFUCKIN' TALKING ABOUT ALL THIS MOTHERFUCKIN FLUSH I'VE GOT FOR YOU! ALL THIS MOTHERFUCKIN' FLUSH I'VE BEEN BEING LIKE TO KEEP SECRET FOR YOU! I know you feel pale bro, and I wasn't like to mess that up for you, I'm sorry. I was just being like to keep a motherfucker happy. But I can't keep on denying all of this red what fills me up for you, bro. It hurts like a motherfuckin' wound to be keeping this all secret like."

Your eyes grow wide as his messed up words finally find some order in your thinkpan. Suddenly all of it makes sense, and you're so fucking relieved. You can't help it, you fall to the floor laughing and you just hope he doesn't take it the wrong way.

"WHAT THE MOTHERFUCK IS SO MOTHERFUCKIN' FUNNY BRO?" he shouts at you, getting upset.

"Gamzee, you sludge brained, moron! I've been so fucking messed up about this all day! I was looking for you everywhere!" you yell between gasps and peals of laughter.

"Okay bro, but I don't motherfuckin' see how that's all got to be doing anything with what I just all up and confessed to you just now."

"Gamzee," you calm down, pulling his big hands into your smaller ones, "I've been looking for you all day, to tell you that I'm red for you, you idiot!"

The grin that breaks out over his big, stupid face is nothing short of, well… miraculous.

You finally let yourself settle and pull him into a sloppy kiss, momentarily not caring that the asshole's face paint is going to get smudged all over your cheeks.

"Motherfuck, bro." the clown says when you pull away, "I was all like to be wanting to do that first."

You smile, "Look Gamzee. If we're doing this, we're really doing this okay? None of this fucking vacillating between the red quadrants bullshit. You're not my moirail anymore and I'm not yours okay? We're doing this by the fucking book. I don't want any more confused messed up feelings about this stuff. I've got enough of that, and right now, all I really want… is a matesprit."

"Well, fuck bro." Gamzee smiles, "I wouldn't have it any other motherfuckin' way."

Your name is GAMZEE MAKARA and you're chill as a motherfucker right now. You got your matesprit all up on one arm and you're shooting the motherfuckin' finger at you're kismesis with the other. Karkat's got his growl on at the fucker across the room he's all up and got black feelings for. And best of all is you don't even got to be pretending like you know how to give relationship advice anymore, because Karkat's got himself a new moirail too.

John's a lot better at calmin' the little motherfucker down too. It's like he all up and knows the words before they even come out of Karkat's talkblaster. And he just gets his motherfuckin' shoosh on before it even happens.

You don't see much to motherfuckin' caring about it though. You got the better end of the deal, you think.

Tavros' voice doesn't even bother you anymore. You even got up to burying the motherfuckers head a little while after you and Karkat switched quadrants. You got all up to thinking your bro deserved a little more respect than to be carried around like that. And you'd moved on. You knew somewhere in your blood pump that Tav would be all up and getting proud of you for that.

"Hey asshole, were you even listening to me?"

"Aw shit bro," you say turning your attention to Karkat, "I was all like to be zoning out there for a minute I think."

"Yeah I fucking thought so." Karkat rolled his eyes, "Come down here and kiss me, asshat."

You give a lazy smile and lean down to be like to get your sloppy makeouts on with your flushed bro.

You think you could be all like to getting used to this for a long motherfuckin' time.

Like maybe forever.


End file.
